Violating the Pig

So while wonder was busy popping out kids and taking a break from being a working bitch, Kunty was across the pond trying to finish her schooling in order to get her Master's. Having done so both were being wooed by the Great Schlong. The Schlong knew that to get one or the other back he had to make promises. One of them being that they would be working together the WHOLE season (or at least until Wonder moved to be with her husband) and that he would get them a pick up truck, not as big as Pool Master Kat's but something so that Amazon Wonder would not have to look like the HunchBack Of Notre Dame getting in and out of to get equipment and chemicals. Needless to say a month went by and still no truck, and the Great Schlong started to make excuses. After much thought and descussion Kunty and Wonder came up with a plan. Like any Hero the Great Schlong had his weakness, Wonders 44DD breasts. Now Wonder being the responsible hero that she was only used them in times of great distress. This being one of them. So while at one of their pools Kunty comes up with an idea. You see this one pool has wooden pigs throughout the yard and the Great Schlong for some reason thinks that wooden farm animals in the front yard are a good idea. So why not combine two of his favorite things. "Go and get your camera phone and take your top off and sit on the pig, then send it to the Great Schlong. " Without a moments hesitation Wonder replies "ok" and sets off to get the phone. Sitting astride the pig TOPLESS and rodeo style trying not to laugh her ass of when Kunty takes the picture. They send it to the Schlong who responds in text message ' Just awesome just awesome. ' The whole day the picture cracks up our heros and has made the Schlong talk about what kind of truck they will be getting. The moral of the story here? Only use your super powers for GOOD not Evil!

Kunty and Wonder

Our summer superhero's are still plowing through the list that the Great Schlong has given them in order to satisfy the Hampton's Elite, when the happen onto yet another pool. It's cold and raining and Wonder has had about ENOUGH. They pull the cover off of said pool and as Wonder drags out the equipment to start overboarding the beast Kunty is looking around the shed (that would put most two bedroom houses to shame) for the cover bag and the baskets and eyeballs for the returns. One of the shed doors and locked, so Kunty walks around to the other the whole while Wonder is cussing and muttering trying to get things done. As Kunty comes back around the shed reporting that there is no sign of said cover bag and that even if there was there would be no way to get it as the shed is chock full of SHIT that most people will NEVER use in their lifetime. So they give up momentairly, and get to work. While Kunty is vaccing out the pool, because being the controller that she is Wonder does not do it fast enough, Wonder goes about backwashing the filter and getting the chems ready to put in the pool as soon as Kunty is done. Wonder however soon gets bored, (seeing as how she has the attention span of a goldfish this happens quite often) and decides to investigate the shed further. Walking into the shed Wonder finds the light switch and begins to look around. To her relief she finds the cover bag, shoved in the far right corner of the shed. She begins to climb over chairs and boxes and rugs and tables and other such things when she happens to find a few piles of shit. Wonder who along with a short attention span has a vivid imagination stops cold. Wondering if she should continue or just back out and pretend that she never saw anything decides to continue on with her venture and grab the stupid f@#$ing cover bag and get the hell out. Wonder returns from the shed and shows her prize to Kunty who at this time is fighting a rose bush near the equipment because NO ONE knows how to prune their shrubbery. "Great you found it where was it at?" she asks Wonder, "In the far right corner of the shed" ' Well it's one last thing we have to worry about right!?' "Yes' responds Wonder, ' but either they have a small dog or a very large rodent problem' Why would you say that" Kunty asks. So Wonder proceeds to tell her of the obstocle course and the shit piles and then adds ' I think they are breeding King Cobra's and must have mongooses' to control the overbreeding.' At this Kunty laughs so loud and hard that she is doubled over, and when she stands up gets snagged by a thorne and recieves a most horrifying injury to the scalp. Cussing and screaming and standing up out of breath from laughing, they leave the mongoose house in East Hampton with blood running down Kunty's face only to fight another day.

The Enoch Incident

So it's the summer of pool bitching and our heros, yes I did say hero's Kunty Kunterson and Wonder Titts who are yet again working for the order of the Schlong in trying to get the pools right for the Hampton's Elite along side their more humble coworkers whom we shall describe at a later date. Kunty and Wonder are slamming through the openings one fine May morning thinking hey we will DEFINATLY have these pools on the Great Schlong's list open by Memorial Day, when they happen upon the dreaded Nappeauge Stretch to the Horrid Enoch Pool. Now keep in mind that this pool is a vyn-all pool and is in DESPERATE need of a new liner, but with the evil Enoch forces refusing to replace it for YEARS the pool shows no signs of hope until in their trusty white steed our super hero's arrive, ok so it was a white ford van with the pool company logo on the side but you get the point. After two days of filling, again NEW LINER ENOCH they take off the cover only to find that the blue liner is GREEN from the Alge. So they do what any good pool bitch would do and they pull out all the stops the over board pump the extra hoses the extension cords the 5gallons of liquid chlorine the nets the brushes ALL OF IT. Well, while our unsuspecting hero's are working in seperate area's the equipment decides to help the pool try and take them down. Fist Kunty can be heard yelling and cussing by the filter and pump. Then wonder sets up the overboard and starts to suck the algae out of said pool. Unsuspecting Kunty wanders on to the deck only to be tripped by the extension cord. The pump STOPS. Kunty and Wonder gaze at each other wonder what is going to happen next, when all of a sudden, there is a sizzling sound and THE CORDS CATCH FIRE. Now our hero's always the professionals look at each other and start screaming like the girls they are, until Wonder Titts has the where with all to shout at Kunty Kunterson "UNPLUG THE CORD UNPLUG THE CORD" Kunty sprints to the side of the house and unplugs the extension cord while the fire continues to grow. Why not just throw said pump into the pool to extenguish the flames you ask? Because at the precise moment our superhero's were both TOOLES. Lucky for them in the misdt of all the girly screaming there was a running house and Kunty started to put out the fire. Alas, order was restored and Kunty and Wonder picked up the implements of destruction, I mean pool cleaning and said to each other "FUCK THIS LET'S GO HAVE A BEER"